Yo Mama So Ugly

Yo Mama So Ugly

Yo Mama So Ugly, probably the most insulting of all Yo Mama Jokes.  There always that one mother that look like she feel out the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.  Life has been cruel to that ugly mama and you will too with this set of Yo Mama So Ugly Jokes.

Yo mama so ugly that even Bill Clinton wouldn’t sleep with her.

Yo mama so ugly that even Rice Krispies won’t talk to her!

Yo mama so ugly that her birth certificate contained an apology letter from the condom factory.

Yo mama so ugly that her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her.

Yo mama so ugly that her pillow cries at night.

Yo mama so ugly that her shadow ran away from her.

Yo mama so ugly that I took her to a haunted house and she came out with a job application.

Yo mama so ugly that I took her to the zoo, guy at the door said “Thanks for bringing her back.”

Yo mama so ugly that if she was a scarecrow, the corn would run away.

Yo mama so ugly that it looks like she’s been bobbing for french fries.

Yo mama so ugly that it looks like someone did the stanky leg dance on her face.

Yo mama so ugly that just after she was born, her mother said “What a treasure!” and her father said “Yes, let’s go bury it.”

Yo mama so ugly that people at the circus pay money not to see her.

Yo mama so ugly that people go as her for Halloween.

Yo mama so ugly that people hang her picture in their cars so their radios don’t get stolen.

Yo mama so ugly that Santa pays an elf to drop off her gifts at Christmas.

Yo mama so ugly that she can look up a camel’s butt and scare the hump off of it.

Yo mama so ugly that she climbed the ugly ladder and didn’t miss a step.

Yo mama so ugly that she could be the poster child for birth control.

Yo mama so ugly that she could make a freight train take a dirt road.

Yo mama so ugly that she could scare the flies off a shit wagon.

Yo mama so ugly that she didn’t get hit with the ugly stick, she got hit by the whole damn tree.

Yo mama so ugly that she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween!

Yo mama so ugly that she gives Freddy Kreuger nightmares.

Yo mama so ugly that she has 7 years bad luck just trying to look at herself in the mirror.

Yo mama so ugly that she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning.

Yo mama so ugly that she looks like she’s been in a dryer filled with rocks.

Yo mama so ugly that she made an onion cry!

Yo mama so ugly that she made Barack Obama lose hope!

Yo mama so ugly that she makes blind children cry.

Yo mama so ugly that she practices birth control by leaving the lights on.

Yo mama so ugly that she put the Boogie Man out of business!

Yo mama so ugly that she scares the roaches away.

Yo mama so ugly that she threw a boomerang and it wouldn’t even come back.

Yo mama so ugly that she tried to take a bath and the water jumped out!

Yo mama so ugly that she turned Medusa to stone!

Yo mama so ugly that she’d scare the monster out of Loch Ness.

Yo mama so ugly that she’s never seen herself ’cause the mirrors keep breaking.

Yo mama so ugly that that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her.

Yo mama so ugly that that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye.

Yo mama so ugly that the government moved Halloween to her birthday!

Yo mama so ugly that the last time I saw something that looked like her, I pinned a tail on it.

Yo mama so ugly that they didn’t give her a costume when she auditioned for Star Wars.

Yo mama so ugly that they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints

Yo mama so ugly that they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.

Yo mama so ugly that we put her in the kennel when we go on vacation.

Yo mama so ugly that when I last saw a mouth like hers, it had a hook in it.

Yo mama so ugly that when she drove past area 51, she was thought to be extraterrestrial life. They took her away never to be seen again.

Yo mama so ugly that when she goes to the therapist, he makes her lie on the couch face down.

Yo mama so ugly that when she joined an ugly contest, they said “Sorry, no professionals.”

Yo mama so ugly that when she looks in the mirror it says “viewer discretion is advised.”

Yo mama so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, the reflection looks back and shakes its head.

Yo mama so ugly that when she moved into the projects, all her neighbors chipped in for curtains.

Yo mama so ugly that when she walks down the street in September, people say “Wow, is it Halloween already?”

Yo mama so ugly that when she walks in the kitchen, the rats jump on the table and start screaming.

Yo mama so ugly that when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras.

Yo mama so ugly that when she was born she was put in an incubator with tinted windows.

Yo mama so ugly that when she was born, the doctor slapped her AND her parents!

Yo mama so ugly that when she went to a beautician it took 12 hours… to get a quote!

Yo mama so ugly that when she went to Taco Bell everyone ran for the border.

Yo mama so ugly that you have to tie a steak around her neck so the dog will play with her!

Yo mama so ugly that… well… look at you!

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